Are you stuck?
Do you know someone who’s stuck in a miserable situation? Or simply, lacks the ambition to break the 9 to 5 cycle and go after their dreams? Well, we are all capable of change as long as we are presented with an undeniable bargaining chip. In other words, some people will only change if they are faced with an unequivocal, no holds barred situation. However, the risk of dying isn’t always enough to get someone to change. The bottom line – no one wants to be told what to do especially when it comes to change.
What’s your breaking point?
There are some situations or feelings that make it fairly easy to change – the unconditional love for our children or a desire to grow deeper in our faith. Nevertheless, regardless of what it takes, everyone has their breaking point. Therefore, if your inner voice is telling you to make a change, you have to find that overpowering leverage that will make you do it. It may be buried under mounds of dirt, but it’s there. Question is – how do we tap into that leverage?
Change is hard
Well, from personal experience, change requires work and vulnerability. And frankly, many people become too comfortable in their mundane lives. Not to mention, they settle with a mediocre life and forget about their hopes and dreams. In essence, they ignore the warning signs of their breaking point trying to surface.
Tony Robbins illustrates a reluctance to change with the Scrooge in the Christmas Carol. In the beginning of this movie, it’s very apparent the scrooge has no desire to change. In fact, he appears quite content in his misery. But in actuality, the Scrooge is unhappy and guarding himself from people because they hurt him in the past. Consequently, he has conditioned himself to believe his wealth resulted in being stern with people. Sounds distorted to me, but the scrooge made the association of people to pain.
However, when the Scrooge finally came to terms with his past, he gained enough leverage to change his form of thinking. This mind alteration occurs as a “neuro-association” (when your nervous system decides what constitutes pain and pleasure) (Robbins). With that being said, the way change happens is by reconditioning your intuitive nature (your gut) to believe something is actually pleasurable rather than painful or vice versa. For example, I used to eat my beloved pasta 3 – 4 times a week until I realized it made me extremely bloated. So, something I used to associate with pleasure, is now associated with pain. In addition, sometimes exercise is a painful activity without an initial stretch. Unfortunately, any prior associations embedded in your mind and gut will take over your conscious thoughts.
So what can you do if you know you need to change, but have established neuro-associations? First, stop making excuses. If you’re in a bad relationship, don’t reminisce about the “good times.” In addition, don’t daydream about what the future may hold. Frankly, it’s a distorted reality that quells your current painful state. In essence, it prevents you from accepting reality and changing your “neuro-associations”. Living in the present is the only guarantee we have.
As Tony Robbins states, you need to adopt a “Dickens pattern – when your brain links something painful in the past to being even worse in the future.” As a result, your brain is submerged in the pain association and has no choice but to change. For example, if you were in a room filling up with smoke, would you stay or leave? It’s pretty simple really – “give yourself leverage on yourself” (Robbins). Don’t wait for someone else to make your mind up for you. Take charge of the state you’re in.
So what state are you in? Per Tony Robbins, “everyone is controlled by their rituals; they can either put you into a state or take you out of a state.” Ultimately, the objective is to condition your mind in order to be in your most desired state. Whatever you want to achieve requires changing your perspective. In addition, try asking yourself these series of questions: what gets you REALLY excited in life, what are you TRULY proud of, and what are you GENUINELY grateful for? (Robbins) This self-reflection will help you see the way you feel, speak, and live your life according to the answers from these questions (Robbins). Not to mention, it will help zero in on your focus and thus, establish new daily rituals.
In conclusion, I truly believe that if you practice positive self talk such as “I’m braver than you believe, stronger than I seem, and smarter than you think,” then anything is possible. Let’s face it – if you do the opposite and play the role of martyr by saying, “bad luck follows me every where I go,” you will find yourself in a state of being stuck. Lastly, just remember the saying, “seek and you shall find.” The sky’s the limit when you’re reaching for the stars. With that being said, here’s to living your best life ever! Feel free to leave me a comment on the topic of being stuck in a rut and check out our new store –
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